What I Took Away from my First Year of College

I haven't posted in two months. I have to do better, I know. I've been busy. There were finals, interviews, and lots more excuses that I could make as to why I've been neglecting my ever-so-amazing readers. In short, I'm sorry. I could say it won't happen again, but I'd probably be lying. I'm getting busier every day but that's only because I'm trying to take full advantage of what my amazing campus has to offer.

My freshman year of college is over. I honestly can't believe it. It flew. I met an amazing bunch of people, especially my marvelous roommate Marina.

Here's what I learned.

I was a star in high school. Not a casual far away star that could be seen in some night settings, but basically, I was the fucking sun. No one really knew up until my senior year though when college admissions came out and I was the only one who got into Duke, Swarthmore, and a couple other top schools. I was captain of the softball team, secretary of NHS, started my own business.. and the list continues. Even though I'm now a student at The University of Florida, I can honestly tell you that my high school achievements don't matter at all. Not one bit. Not one single bit. No one cares what you did in high school. You have a fresh start. For some, it's facilitative, but for me it definitely took some adjusting.

I had to go to the library and study? You mean, open a book and stare at the information and hope that it seeped into my neurons somehow? Three 'B's my entire high school career and I had never studied a day in my life. I was lost and confused and really not used to not being one of the best in my classes of over 400 people. I didn't fail, but I didn't do as well as I could. In short, learn which way of studying works for you. For some, it's group efforts, maybe it's reading, maybe it's being tutored (which costs), whatever way it is make sure to figure it out fast.

Friends. Join organizations and friends will find you. It's a little harder making friends in college because you're not surrounded by a particular group of people unless you choose to be. There are so many great organizations. Yes, some are extraordinarily competitive and some you can come and go as you please, but make sure you find your niche. Don't waste all your time in your room. It's bad for your mental health and maybe even your physical. The dust in those dorms is crazy.

Partying? Mama's not here anymore to tell you when to come home. For some, this is not a big change from what they're used to, for others, they've entered a parallel universe. Make SURE you balance your partying and your schoolwork. Exam tomorrow? "But-- but that pa--." No. I promise you, they're not much different from one another. There will be another party tomorrow.
Can I drink? What is this guy offering me? Should I smoke? Should I go home with him? These are all questions you should ask yourself. While I wouldn't recommend to ever ever ever use any drugs, the fact of the matter is that many students do. Some can handle it, some crash and burn, and in the case of UF, some have died. Be careful. Never take anything from someone you don't know. I know you've read it in the pamphlet. You're going to hear it at preview. You're going to read it in your required drug and alcohol course again, but I'm reiterating because of its sheer importance.

So, you got an 89.whatever? Did you go to this professor's office hours? Would he know you if you saw him in the hallway? No? Well then, you're stuck with an 89. I had to learn this the hard way. I was a quarter of a point from getting an A in macroeconomics. Oh well. Again, this isn't high school anymore. If the syllabus says "grades will not be rounded." They probably won't be rounded. It sucks. Professors have so many students that they can't give special treatment. Suck it up and study harder next time. On the off chance you did form a bond with your professor that semester, I'd go talk to him/her, but don't expect anything.

Networking. Now, I'm a business student, so networking may be a little bit more important to me than someone studying health sciences or engineering but all in all, it's such an important part of college. Is a company coming to your school? GO. Are there organizations who bring in speakers? GO. You could be missing out on the opportunity of a lifetime. I was searching for internships this summer and called a representative of Deloitte only to find out that I'd missed their deadline. "Did you go to Career Showcase?" he asked, "Uhhh-ermmm-uhhh." Yeah. I would've known their deadline had I gone. You better believe I won't miss another one.

Are you attending a PWI? I designed this as a black girl blog, so I have to face the debate I really do not like discussing. PWI vs HBCU? Honestly, go wherever is the best combination of financial value, alumni connections, and coursework rigor. I promise you, black people exist at PWIs. Most PWIs have their own black community. Because UF is so massive, our black community essentially functions like an HBCU. Do what your heart desires, but don't end up regretting it later if you're sitting on piles of debt or piles of your own resume because you can't get a job.

Well.

I think I've covered my main points. If you have any questions, you know where to find me. Twitter, Facebook Messenger, or you can email this email account.

xo
-Crys.

Here's a fun thing everyone should do tomorrow

VOTE.

A Letter to my IB Juniors

I wrote "A Letter to my IB Seniors" about two months ago and got some requests for tips for IB Juniors as well, so here it is!

I know the seniors are getting their college acceptances back right now and are planning for events like gradbash and prom and it just seems like you're struggling for nothing. Junior year in IB is rather uneventful. It's like it's hard enough so that you know you're an upperclassman but you have so long until you graduate it just feels like you're going to be working this hard forever. I promise you, your senior year is around the corner and once it's over, it'll feel like it flew by. 

In the meantime, here are some tips for your survival. 

1) USE that agenda that you bought in the beginning of the school year and stopped paying attention to in September. Even if you use your phone, I promise that there is no feeling like being able to physically cross something off of a checklist.

2) Make sure that you are on top of your schedule. With so many things going on, it can feel like days are a blur. Make sure you're keeping track of everything you do so you don't miss any practices, meetings, or assignments.

3) Make the effort to talk to your teachers! They each have hundreds of students that they are responsible for grading and will most likely forget about things they said they'd do for you. (But DON'T pester them) This applies for your work too! If you're having issues with something, most will stay after class or will let you make an appointment to go over something).

4) Sign up to take both the SAT and the ACT. Take them both once and then compare your scores, whichever one you do the best on, take once or twice more until you feel you've reached an ideal score. I took the SAT three times and jumped from an 1860 to a 2110, so don't skip that third time just because you don't feel like retesting. It makes a huge difference. 

5) Start narrowing down your choices for the schools you're going to apply for. I'd say 10-15 schools is a good place to be right now and 6-8 schools is the right amount to apply to. Make sure you have a mix of reach schools (schools that you have a chance of getting into but are very risky), on-target schools (schools that you fit the qualifications for but are still slightly risky), and backup schools (schools that you are overqualified for and will for sure get into.) For the average IB student in Florida, reach schools would be Ivy Leagues, on-target schools would be UF, FSU, UCF, and USF, and backup schools would be local in-state schools like FIU and Nova (not that there is anything wrong with wanting to attend these schools, they typically offer full rides to IB students). A great book to get if you're completely lost is The Princeton Review's 377 Best Colleges, it has overviews of the best 377 schools in the US with feedback from students.

6) Start studying for your APs. A lot of AP tests double as IB tests, and if you're going to a state school then you could pass the AP version of certain tests and not have to put so much pressure on yourself to pass the IB version in your senior year. And personally, I found AP easier than IB (but I think I'm one of the only people with that opinion).

7) Start your Extended Essay over the summer. The Extended Essay is single-handedly the most annoying part of IB. If you piece it up and write it over the summer, not only will you not have to deal with it at the same time as a million other things, but you will have time to get it reviewed by teachers and turn in quality work. Or you could just write it the week before and get a D like I did. :)

8) Start paying attention to the emails from Ms. Mamby (or if you don't attend Miramar High School, whoever your college counselor is) as soon as you get them. There are great scholarships in there that too often go unclaimed. Also, apply for small scholarships! They usually take less effort than the more well-known scholarships and they add up really quickly! Don't write them off.

9) Save money. Save all of it. Your senior year is so expensive, especially if you want to participate in the activities. And college... well let's just say I'm more broke right now than I was my senior year. 

10) Start drafting your resume and have a trusted teacher or advisor look at it. If you can get an English/humanities teacher to look at it that would be even better because they know the most about making language more effective. College resumes are not the time to be humble. Sell yourself. Make sure you let your admissions board know about the positive change you've influenced in every organization that you were a part of. Fluff it up, but don't fib.

Those are ten pretty basic tips that will help ensure your survival for the next year or so. If there's anything that I didn't mention or that you want me to cover in more depth feel free to Facebook or Twitter message me, as well as email me at crystalmcduffy24@ufl.edu. Hope this helped!

xo -Crys.

The Importance of Educating White People Rather than Attacking Them

Before anything, I'm a realist.

It's real that we have been oppressed for centuries.
It's real that we have the right to be angry about our unfair treatment worldwide.
It's real that white privilege is a problem all too common in modern American society.


Unfortunately, it's also real that we live in America: full of white voters, white politicians, and white police officers that all combine to form the lovely system that we have today. This system perpetuates white supremacy, even though "discrimination ended ages ago." Part of the reason that I started writing in the first place is to do my part to change this unjust system that has been forced upon African-Americans. We all have a voice and I want everyone to use theirs-- just in the most effective way.

Here's where some of you guys are going to hate me. And that's okay, just hear me out.
In my humble opinion, I think that we have to be less aggressive in the way that we come at people who aren't familiar with the issues we face (ie- most white people). I'm not saying to condone racism, because that's simply unacceptable. What I am saying, however, is that instead of attacking people for not knowing what it's like to be black (because they're not black), we move our goal to education and not just trying to "expose people's inner racism," when in most (not all) cases, it's simply ignorance because of things that they just don't have the exposure to.

Example-- Sam Smith. Here's a series he tweeted when a friend of his encountered racism in London.

Sam Smith is a white man who has had the privilege of never having to deal with racism. Ever. As a man in the music world who works with a lot of black professionals on a daily basis, should he have been more aware of issues that POC face? I think so. But, some black people attacked him on twitter for tweeting so "passively." Some responses were sarcastic, such as "white man becomes aware that racism exists," and other messages of that nature. Look-- Sam Smith is a white man. Because of his place in society, he will never have to deal with racism, and usually, when people aren't exposed to things that they don't have to deal with-- they're ignorant to them. Sam Smith tweeted to his millions of followers angrily about racism, and that gets attention, which is a good thing. I can name countless incidents of white people being absolutely flabbergasted when I informed them about some of the things that I've had to deal with growing up. Want to know why? Because they don't have to deal with racism! Ever! When people are so engaged in the #BlackLivesMatter movement and combating their struggles, they can often become blind to the harsh realities that are entirely too true of this nation. According to the US Census, 62% of Americans are white, which means that 62% of Americans don't have to know a damn thing about race or race relations to live a happy life. If we want change, we have to inform our white counterparts of the issues and not just attack them when they don't know about them because they don't have to live through them.

If I'm being completely honest, there's a myriad of racial issues that my black ass wasn't even aware of until recently because I grew up in mostly white community. No one talked about them because everyone was white, so no one had to. I had white friends, white history teachers, white principals, white coaches, and white counselors, all who didn't treat me any differently because I was black, (well, not differently enough that I could tell) and I really thought racism was a thing of the past and no one could tell me anything different. So, if a black girl in a white community didn't know anything about racism do you really think white people are aware? Again, this is NOT FAIR. This is NOT OKAY. It's an atrocity that we have to educate people about a problem that THEIR ANCESTORS started. It sucks, but I think it's one of the only ways that they're going to listen. And because of what I previously said about us living in a white nation, we have to get them to listen if we want laws to go our way and change to actually be seen. If we just attack people who don't know better, we just look like some angry mob from their standpoint. Do I think white people should have to know about the struggles they caused? Yes. Do I think they will if we don't tell them? No. It is not our JOB or responsibility to educate the masses. Our anger and aggression is so valid, but will it work? I want progress, and I think the route of education will make progress.

This brings me to another point. I'm sure by now we've all heard Macklemore's new song, "White Privilege II." Some people like it and some don't. I don't think it was meant for black people to like. I think that it was meant to reach more white minds and spark conversation in the minds of white Americans because any conscious black American already knows about what is going on and the all-too-relevant lyrics of today's conscious black rappers, my personal favorite being Kendrick Lamar. Macklemore, as a softer rapper, hits an audience that bridges the rock, pop, and rap categories-- an audience that is mostly white. Since the song came out, eight of my white friends (four who aren't up-to-par on social issues) have asked me my opinion on it and have asked if everything stated is true. Dialogue has been provoked, people have become aware--progress is being made. It's not much, but it's progress nonetheless. Now, tons of people think Macklemore wants praise for standing on his soapbox and making up for the guilt he has harbored for winning a Grammy over Kendrick Lamar. Could this be true? Honestly, only Macklemore could answer that question. Regardless, I respect him for the song and his previous action in the movement to preserving black lives and black culture. It's not just a song for him because he has been present at protests and previously active in the movement. Here's a photo of him at a Seattle protest for Mike Brown.

I'm not saying we have to all go out, hold hands, and sing Kumbaya. But what I am saying is that all white people aren't out to get us and education is the priority. I know this probably wasn't what you expected of me, so leave your opinion if you have a different viewpoint.

xo -Crys.

A Letter to My IB Seniors

You just finished college applications and it feels like a weight has been lifted, right? Oh don't worry, your IAs, CAS requirements, clubs, and study sessions for exams will replace that weight soon! I would be lying to you if I didn't say that this is probably going to be the hardest four months of your life. But I also would be lying if I said that you won't make it through. You will! You CAN do this!

IB has been hard since freshman year and after you get used to the workload, it's actually not too bad until your senior year. Its like everything gets thrown at you all at once and it does not stop. You're fine until about mid-October when you realize you have to actually fill out the college applications to get into the schools you want to go to. Oh and that Extended Essay? That's not going to write itself either! If you're a student who doesn't procrasti-- You know what? I'm not even going to go there because the people who don't procrastinate are probably doing some homework right now instead of reading this (please don't stop reading this, do your homework after).

Here are some tips to get through the rest of the year-

1) USE that agenda that you bought in the beginning of the school year and stopped paying attention to in September. Even if you use your phone, I promise that there is no feeling like being able to physically cross something off of a checklist.

2) Bring your laptop to school. I don't know if the school wifi still works on personal devices, but if it does, bring your laptop! I can't tell you how much time I have saved by using spare time at school to do things that I would only be able to do at home if I hadn't brought it with me.

3) Make sure that you are on top of your schedule. With so many things going on, it can feel like days are a blur. Make sure you're keeping track of everything you do so you don't miss any practices, meetings, or assignments.

4) Make the effort to talk to your teachers! They each have hundreds of students that they are responsible for grading and will most likely forget about things they said they'd do for you. (But DON'T pester them) This applies for your work too! If you're having issues with something, most will stay after class or will let you make an appointment to go over something).

5) Don't forget that you're not just an IB Senior, you're a senior! Make memories and enjoy your last couple months of high school. Go to events, take endless pictures, and cherish the rest of the time you have before you have to pay for your own food and textbooks. Seriously.

6) Don't worry yourself about the status of your college applications. Once they're submitted, they're submitted. There's nothing you can do but wait. I spent hours rereading my Columbia application after I submitted it and wondering if there was anything I could've done to make it better. Well guess what? My ass still didn't get in.

7) Look forward to graduation. I promise you, getting that diploma is the best feeling in the world.

8) Do not give up! Yes, senior year is hell and I won't try to downplay how hard it is, but can I tell you how amazing it is to have entered college with 45 credits? The beginning level English, History, and Psychology classes in college are hard and involve long readings and even longer papers! Do you want to be stuck in a class that has nothing to do with your major because you didn't work hard enough in high school? NO! Get it out of the way NOW! Brew your coffee because here come the all-nighters! Cry now and laugh later at all of your non-IB friends who have to take entry level classes in college.

You can do this. I believe in you guys. If you ever need anything, feel free to Facebook or Twitter message me, or email me at crystalmcduffy24@ufl.edu!

 xo -Crys.

MLK Day and Its Personal Meaning to Me

My grandmother, aunt, and great-grandfather are somewhere in this ocean of people.

It's 2016, and we're all woke and whatnot, but I've never publicly explained how significant the Civil Rights Movement is to me. My family has forever instilled this gratitude in me because I know that they fought for me. And for you.

For years, I hated being black. I hated my hair, my skin, my wide nose, and my thick thighs. Up until high school, I went to schools that were 85-90% white. Constantly being surrounded by people that didn't look like me, didn't understand my culture, and didn't have to go through the same things that I had to go through on a daily basis made me feel like everything about me was just wrong. I just never seemed to understand why I didn't fit in. Then, at family dinners, my aunt and grandma would share their endless stories about interactions with Dr. King and inviting Medgar Evers over for dinner and I rolled my eyes like I didn't have the most amazing family in the world. Current me hates me for doing this, but then again I hated myself up until I was around 16--but that's a-whole-nother article. 

I took everything for granted growing up. I lived in a nice neighborhood, had parents that supported me in whatever I wanted to pursue, and had everything I needed and pretty much whatever I wanted. I'm incredibly lucky. Up until recently, I never took the time to reflect on what got me here. Without the steps that Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. took, I wouldn't have the amazing opportunities that I have today. Without the March on Washington, or the Montgomery Bus Boycott, or numerous sit-ins that MLK started, I wouldn't be able to go wherever I pleased without question. Without the steps of trailblazers like my very own aunt, Verna Bailey, who was the first black woman to attend the University of Mississippi, I wouldn't be able to attend the best university in the state of Florida. Without my grandmother, Dr. Shirley Johnson's, participation in the March on Selma, I wouldn't be able to live peacefully in a southern city. Without my great grandfather, Samuel Bailey, founding and presiding over the Mississippi chapter of the NAACP, I wouldn't be a part of one of the greatest organizations in the nation that has provided me with a safe space to be able to talk about the issues that people of color face.

I'm so ashamed that it took me this long to thank those who paved the way for me, but I'm so glad we are taking the time to remember all of the amazing things that Dr. King has done for us. While King's work significantly improved our conditions, please don't think that we are done fighting. Systematic oppression, microaggressions, police brutality, and the "black tax" are just a few of the issues that all people of color still face today. So stay informed, stay aware, do your part, and never ever stop fighting. 

Happy MLK Day.

xo -Crys.

Makeup for a Quick Everyday Face in Under 8 Minutes

We all know one girl. No matter where you see her-- the dining hall, class, or the library, her face is always beat to the Gods. Foundation airbrushed, highlight looking like an angel's halo, eyeliner winged to perfection, you get the point. Well. I'm not that girl. I've never been a makeup guru and I'm probably not ever going to be one, but I have managed to figure out an easy morning routine that makes me look alive and dewy without making me look like I'm trying too hard and I've decided to share it with you!

Note- This is NOT a tutorial, (you can count on my girl Niyah for that, check out her youtube channel btw, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRvzxu4nyP8&feature=youtu.be) I'm definitely not qualified to give one and thats the point! This isn't for makeup addicts. Its just some easy steps for a quick morning routine.

Before: Makeup free, freshly washed face, eye bags on fleek, blackheads shining bright.

Step 1: Start with an under eye concealer that is one shade lighter than your skin. I use Covergirl + Olay- The De-Puffer eye concealer, because as you can see, eye bags are an issue for me. Just dab a little on a wedge and apply as needed to your under-eye area. Takes less than a minute!

Step 2: Apply foundation to your whole face, blending carefully with the concealer that you applied to your under-eye area. Be sure to apply lightly enough so that it doesn't look cakey, but heavily enough so that all your problem spots are taken care of. I use Maybelline Dream Liquid Mousse. It is airy enough that it won't look heavy on your face, but thick enough to take away my awful eye bags! Voila! 

Step 3: Add a few quick strokes of bronzer using a thick, fluffy brush to ensure that the end product doesn't look streaky. I use Covergirl truBlend Minerals. Since this is an everyday class look, I don't apply too much, so you may not be able to see the difference dramatically in pictures, but it looks fantastic for selfies in the sun. 

Step 4: My favorite step! Eyes! I use eyeliner, mascara, and a little eyeshadow. I use Benefit- They're Real Push-Up Eyeliner and Mascara. They are my favorite makeup products EVER! Just apply a little liner to your lashline (wings are optional, but are always a yes for me), a touch of eyeshadow, and mascara to make your eyes go from droopy to dazzling! Don't forget to brush through your eyebrows to make sure they're put together as well. I know filling in your eyebrows is really in right now, but every time I do it, I end up looking atrocious, so I opt out. 

And there you have it! Just let your hair down and you're ready to conquer class! 

Note- Except for my eyeliner and mascara, ALL of the products that I used to achieve my simple but sophisticated look are drugstore makeup products, which proves that you don't have to spend a paycheck at Sephora to look bomb. These are just a couple tips for an easy, everyday look. Hope it helps!

xo-Crys.